The Love that demands death

Jesus answered them saying "The Hour has come that the Son of Man should be glorified. Most assuredly I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone. But if it dies, it produces much grain. He who loves his life will lose it and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves Me, him My Father will honour." "Now My soul is troubled, and what shall I say? Father, save Me from this hour? But for this purpose I came to this hour. Father, glorify You name." John 12:23-28

I suspect that one of the most misunderstood and potentially misleading subjects in the christian church is that of Love. It probably ranks as the most used word in both the christian church and the secular realm. And if indeed, it commands so revered a place in our christian experience, the evil one will do all he can to dilute and transform the meaning of this word. This is a scary thing indeed because so many of us use the Word love but may well invest wholly different meanings into it. In that way, when we translate our different meanings of love into action when we obey commandments like " Love the Lord Your God..." it breeds fruit that turn out to be different from what Jesus had intended.

I should first confess that I had not paid as much attention to discovering a biblical meaning of Love earlier in my walk and the consequences were painful no less. My nominal notion of Love was tied to a purely emotionally charged feeling, deep seated sentimentality and fervent attraction. Since feelings could not be kept charged for extended periods of time, my spirituality appeared to wane whenever I could not keep it within me. In search of these feelings and emotions became so central to my faith that I found myself begging the Lord in prayer to just feel Him. Whether I was changed and whether I commune in His presence was secondary, I just needed to feel Love. It was a very subtle trap for a young believer like myself. Yet before we denounce emotions, I should first state that emotional delight that comes from a true love of God is a real and common experience, indeed I should have concerned myself more with the truths that gave my emotions expression in Christ. That was when I began to learn.

What I found was how the world's definition of love, that was communicated by the media had found a foothold in our understanding of divine love. Actually, I suspect most Christians actually use the media's definition of Love to shape our understanding of christian love. Rather than discovering the biblical meaning of christian Love and using that to evaluate the way the media perpetuates the notion of love, we've often allowed the world to tell us how we should view love and for that matter christian love. Yet when I returned to the Word of God, Love in a biblical context seemed to call us to something different and far deeper. Looking at John 12 carefully, we see a a fuller and more complete picture of Love as the Lord views it.

For one, true christian love is shaped by the death of its Saviour and His glory through it. More than just an emotion, it demands the mind, body, soul and strength to revel in this One great reality. That Christ died in place of mankind who deserved wrath from God, makes our understanding of God's love a whole one. This Love that is demonstrated and imparted to us, gives us a commanding worldview based upon the Gospel, leads us to a moral seriousness in our lifestyle and drives us to total and indescribable delight in Jesus. The Love based upon the Word is thus not restricted to an emotional feeling but instead consumes our mind, heart,emotion and strength through the power of the gospel. It goes far more than strong feeling.

What clearly is a fuller picture of Love brings us to the second point, that true love will hate anything that divides us from Christ. Take verse 25 and 26 for example. The mark of this transformative love/grace in our lives is a hatred for our life in this world. The aroma of wealth, fame and worldly pleasure no longer entice us and quite the contrary, our Love for God has given us a hatred for them. We're no longer bounded to them because of our devotion to Christ. In fact, we're dead to them because the Love for God has executed our attachments to them. More than just a strong emotional attachment to God, we've a strong emotional aversion to the world.

Lastly, true Godly Love will delight in following Jesus and emulate His concern for God's glory. Its true that only when we know Christ can we partake of true Christian Love. Everything else, or any other forms of love that does not stem from God is only a pale shadow. The Love that comes from God weans its possessor to Christ and the christian follows Jesus like a child. It grants a consuming joy to the christian for he is where his Saviour is. He partakes of His Saviour's fellowship and is tenderly watched by His king. Indeed, how then can he desire and delight in seeing His Shepard's name magnified amongst the nations?

This is true Love, far more delightful when founded upon the truth, yes, even far more emotional for it liberates and restores and is so much more consuming because all of a man is transformed in it. Love, in Christ, is not feeble, it executes anything that will not conform to it and transforms the christian toward a real tenderness toward His God and all around Him.

The man strolling through the sun lit paths with hardly a whimper of a complain whose hand holds the hand of a little jolly lad with young eyes that dart at the fluttering of the leaves and the buzzing of the bees, is me. Immersed in my new found passion as a father to a little child, I am wonderfully satisfied. This terrifying and wonderful enterprise of seeing a young child discover his first steps swings my heart into youthful optimism as I discover life all over again through him. The little fingers that trust my guiding hand, the naivety and innocence that carves smiles on my face and passing strangers, the hobble and wobble that accompany each step but oh the sheer delight in being able to run through the grassy patches that lead somehow to the playground are all carefully observed by his doting father.

Yes, I am a father and this is my son. He brings me joy in all my days and sorrow in some nights. He calls me daddy and I read the bed time stories, those fables that charge young ones to beware the lurking monsters and dream of becoming young christian warriors who slay the lurking monsters. We talk about everything, and nothing is childish and my greatest joy lies in teaching him about Jesus. I tell him that Jesus is the greatest man that ever is, that He is God's son who came to take the sins of the world. My son's eyes glitter with amazement as my hands flutter in animation as I communicate the profound truths of God to him. One day, my son will be a pastor, a doctor or a civil servant. Its pretty obvious.... he will never be a teacher or a dentist.

Yes I am a father and he is my son. He swims, he runs, he reads loads, he loves history most and he is an ACS Boy. Best of all, He loves Jesus Christ with all his heart and he spends hours in prayer, communicating with His favourite Father, God Himself. My son meets me every evening to revel in the delights of the Word and he asks me questions that make me smile and we talk about the mysteries of Godliness and theology. My son loves praying with me. I love it when my son comes to his dad not because i pump streams of pocket money into his little wallet but simply because he enjoys being with me. we're friends. We're a father and son team, and we trash everyone in table tennis, tennis and current affairs quizes.

Yes I am a father and this man is my son. He has found a nice lady whom he wishes to marry and he has asked his father if I thought she be a good wife. I scout the bible carefully and organize a series of tea sessions to ensure that any future daughter in law is one who loves Jesus. That's all I look out for. Certainly, my son who has taken after me will be much sought after. ahem :) . She saunters into the room, dressed in beauty, holiness and joy, shyly walking behind my protective son and smiles when we speak about Jesus. During grace, she prays a heartfelt prayer, to bless her boyfriend's father and doubtlessly she passes with flying colours. Soon, she is dressed in beautiful white apparel and my son in glorious black, while I the father hide my tears as the pastor pronounces the sanctified vows over them both. Soon he will be a father.

Yes, these were some of the thoughts that entered my mind whilst playing with a young 2 month old baby in my granny's home. The baby lifted her hands to mine and i smiled quietly, realizing in an instant the joy of seeing children. I spoke to her, she stared at me. She smiled whenever I touched her nose and I laughed back. Life was beginning for her and I thought about mine. I wondered what it meant to be a good son to my earthly and heavenly father. And I did wonder at the deep love a father must have for his son. How God must love his children indeed! Really, The only hassle is the wife bit... :P I need to start praying.

All is Christ (2)

Today was a day of visitations. I began my day in Beach Road, went to Tampiness, then to Ang Mo Kio, later Vivocity, then Orchard, made a trip to Bukit Merah and finally settled back on my chair right in front of this computer. I'm mentally worn out but very much in a state of divine peace, controlled exhilaration and measured heartache. I've met both dying aged and youthful men in one day and thus driven to touching soberness and polite laughter all in this short but stretched 24 hours. The emotions of compassion, love, guilt, joy and sorrow took their time to fall into my hands whilst I juggled them and contemplated their meanings.

I saw an old lady approaching death and all she had in her earthly state was no more than 3 sets of clothing. But pity her not, she was a servant of the most High God. She had lived in prayer, was employed by Jesus for His purpose and suffered her final days with the joy that is given to one who knows that she had the privilege of sharing in Christs' sufferings. I heard her testimony and thought myself deeply worldly and unworthy, because not only did Christ have her, there was nothing left of herself at the end of her worldly tour. Love had conquered her.

Two widows I met lived almost alone and yearned for company and I love them very dearly. When in their company, God roused in my weak heart a glimpse of His compassion for them and I wish so much that Christ would reveal Himself to them, because He has such a heart for the weak and the widows in distress. Just yesterday, I had wrote on my blog with an ire at the lack of concern for real solid biblical truths God had crafted to reveal Himself, this day I was driven to see the demands of Love. God's compassion for the frail is so vast that I would love this moment to hit myself with a stick for ever even doubting its intensity and sufficiency. God will care for these two widows and if you read this, please pray into His compassion for these two ladies, that they may be shown Christ and may throw their lives into the glory of His love.

And I met a number of old friends today. Still young and full of concern for American politics and the state of our nations military :P There was laughter and fellowship and lots of eating. In this state of measured happiness, one could not but give thanks to the Lord for His divine providence and His care. For even the sparrows in the extended ends of the amazon or the non christian fast asleep in his comfy bed as I type is divinely and graciously provided for. What more we who know Him through His son!

And as I returned, I'll put it simply by saying I did not know how exactly to feel! I just looked at Him and realise that all is and belongs to Christ. That Christ who is truth and demands that we know the truth, has made indivisible the nature of truth and the full measure of love. The more we are led to discover the truth, the more we realise the loving nature of God. The deeper we are led to His love, the more we see how it is founded on the truths of the Lordship of Christ.

All is under Christ... is both terrifyingly loving and lovingly terrifying.

Blessed are You, Lord God of Israel, our Father, forever and ever
Yours, O lord, is the greatness,
The power and the glory, the victory and the majesty;

For all that is in heaven and in Earth are YOURS;
YOURS is the kingdom, O LORD

and You are exalted as head over all
Both riches and honour come from You
and You reign over all
In Your hand is power and Might
In Your Hand it is to make great
And to give Strength to all
(1 Chronicles 29:10-12)

All is Christ

Who, you may ask is Jesus Christ? Isn't he an influential historical figure, who grew up as a carpenter, imparted wise sayings in the way many other religious teachers did and finally founded a sect that overcame the Roman Empire? Did he not die a gruesome, shameful death that sparked a social-cultural revolution whose effects still linger today?

I'll pause, smile in earnest... I'll say with supernatural confidence yet with a knowledge of my unworthiness to mention His name or be revealed this truth.

I'll say, "He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by Him all things were created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created through Him and FOR HIM. and He is before all things, and in Him all things consist. And He is the head of the body, the church, who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in all things He may have preeminence." Col 1:15-18

Furthermore I will not hesitate to add that this is not my personal opinion, but rather is a view held by the only God of all known and unknown creation and frankly, only his view matters. Thus He implored it upon me and many others to hold this view of Jesus Christ. And if this opinion is true then knowing Christ and having a right understanding of His work is going to be the most important matter of our whole lives, for all time.

And a christian might soon comment " Yes, I do think I know this. But its not really practical if you ask me. I want to learn the practical stuff, I want to know about how to hear his voice, how to discern his will for my life. In fact, I think when we talk too much about Jesus, we miss out on how we can have miracles in our lives, to have financial success, a healthy life and ... and doesn't that better demonstrate God to a fallen world?"

I'll shake my head slowly and frown to myself. I'll look into your eyes with understated compassion and ask " Does the Living God mean so little to you? If His Word states that All things were created by Him and For Him, that In Him all things consist so that He might have preeminence, is there anything, anything at all more practical and important than knowing Christ and giving Him all your worship?"

" Indeed it is so, For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing but to us who are being saved, it is the POWER OF GOD." (1 Cor 1:18)

and it has been said that people will not fully understand the sovereignty and majesty of Christ but be deeply confounded

"For Jews request a sign and Greeks seek after wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified, to the jews a stumbling block and to the greeks foolishness but to those who are called, CHRIST IS THE POWER AND THE WISDOM OF GOD." (1 Cor 1:22-24)

I'll kindly inform this man, " You probably do not know the God I know. You have a mental conception of Jesus Christ, drilled into you in some church group until you can do the theological sums, but you really do not know Him. For if the God you knew, was and is the God of Paul in Corinthians and Colossians, you will ask for no more, you will delight in nothing less and you will never seek to move away from Jesus in work, doctrine or anything. You will be jealous for His name and wish so much to taste His sweet presence. In fact, the reason why you desire to hear His voice is probably to confirm a salvation you might not have or simply to move ahead in life in a manner that is no different from doing an assessment book with the answer sheet laid out before you."

" To you the cross is boring preachy stuff, plain foolishness really, and you desperately want God to prove Himself to you through some miracle rather than the mighty cross. To you there are higher wisdoms that help you get closer to God - these new wonderful doctrines that are not yet disclosed to you in your sunday school but how you thirst to lay hold of them here. Yet does not that show you to be reprobate already?! Has not God already shown us one supreme way, from which there can be no alternatives and that is through Christ executed? Do you reckon O man, that God will lay a higher doctrine or greater principle for man to approach and worship Him, after having laid His most precious Son on the altar? There is nothing higher, deeper, wider, more magnificent, more powerful or more terrible than Jesus Christ crucified, resurrected in power and forever exalted... will you now, O foolish man, mock the love of God?"

"And that's why you are entrapped in deception. Your Christ is not the Christ of awesome delight. Your Christ does not demand that you suffer with Him in Thankfulness. It is a Christ tailor made for your needs and God will not stand by that! Have you heard of David Brainerd? who lived for a brief 28 years and oh how he was used to transform the world. Brainerd lost each parent at 9 and 14 respectively, got kicked out of Yale because He believed in Christ and the power of the cross, lived with immense suffering, poverty, deprivation, loneliness and crippling illness that eventually took his life away at 28.

This man, yes this weak and fragile man, greatly touched and made humble John Wesley, Jonathan Edwards, Andrew Murray, Hudson Taylor and the list is endless.... why? because despite his agony, he marveled at the sweetness of Christ, and while coughing blood, smitten gravely by tuberculosis rejoiced at the sweetness of Christ. Brainerd was consumed in secret prayer and fasting and how the world conspired to destroy him! He prayed for days and was reluctant when he had to stop, went into the wilderness despite his health to preach to the Indians. And How the world feared this man, how hell trembled at his travails and the words he muttered stalked the flighty demons to unspeakable rage and fear. Was Brainerd consumed with his health, wealth or comfort! No, he said that when he lacked, God gave Him grace to rejoice in heaven all the more! He prayed most intensely for God's reward, which is Christ glory seen in the rescue of man's souls. So my dear man, whose Christ is the real Saviour that needs to be demonstrated to the world? the christ of the healthy, wealthy comfortable man or Brainerd's Christ?"

All things to be taken in perspective

Before I went for my Standard Obstacle Course (SOC), I prayed that if He be willing, He would let me pass. In my heart I tussled with what I wanted and what would glorify God most. After a few minutes, I was led gently to pray that He demonstrate His glory regardless of whether I succeed or not. That was the Rubicon moment, for it dawned upon me that God is not just in control, He has every right to be in control because He holds all authority. He rules it.

So emboldened with that knowledge, I made that run down with an assurance of the King demonstrating Himself. The moment the whistle went, I sped down the road, assured of His glory... and I failed...... but you know what, when I marched back to bunk, He showed me the sky and His majesty and as He led me to praise Him, the joy I found in Him was supreme. He allowed me to delight in Him when I had just experienced a resounding defeat and gently, I was in need of placing things in perspective.

While I was running my SOC, two of my friends were down with terminal illness and might not live longer than 3 years. Children in Africa are struggling to feed their families whilst Christians in India were being killed for standing up for Christ. Somewhere in the prisons of North Korea, my brothers and sisters sing their hymns to the most High while mean jailers prepare to torture them again. Right in Singapore, an old lady begs at the MRT station, selling tissue papers at 30 cents a packet and how the Singaporeans walk pass with disdain and awkwardness. In the face of all this, Christ sits in heaven and holds all things in His hands, having bourne the cross and faced the wrath of the Father.

In the light of all this, is it not embarassing that our conditions should gain so much attention? But gaze our eyes upon Jesus and all things are now in perspective. If preachers should preach with Christ as the center, all things are put into perspective. And that brings so much delight! Because Christ is enough. Healing, success, miracles are just gifts, suffering, pain, death are just passing.... why? because Christ is all and enough!

So I ran my SOC again and I passed. Yes I passed and it could not take away or add to my joy... because Christ is enough