God,
I am before you.
Charlie N.
It is because your mercies are endless that I am able to breathe my next breath and open my mouth to give you praise. You have led me to remember the days of my youth, when I was but a boy at the tender age of 9 (primary 3). You sought for me a teacher, one who would infuse into my heart the knowledge of your word, for she read the bible to our class every day after the exams.
You knew O Lord, how I was eager to hear the stories of animals and the ark of Noah because I was drawn to fantastical stories. It was not that I should treasure the knowledge of your Saving work or marvel at Your ever gracious and intervening hand in the annuals of human past. I was a child but I knew sin and my heart and mind were darkened to Your love. Yet you formed in my heart a firm grip on the facts for my teacher read clearly the chapters from Genesis. For even as a child, You were ever present in my life, and though I knew You not then, You knew me and bequeathed to me precious gifts.
For are You not my owner? my maker and my God? Were you not always patient with me? How can I not give You praise? You are the invisible, all pervasive and ever present King, to which the hosts of heaven and powers on earth tremble and worship and yet you are the concerned Father who tenderly places myself and many others into bed. It is a mystery to me O Lord, one that I embrace but wonder at still.
Sunday, November 08, 2009
Saturday, November 07, 2009
An orchestrated whole
Of the many tunes I like, this one has been on my player every possible moment. So often, that if you were to listen to it anytime during the evening over the next few days, I should probably be listening to it too.
why? for in it, I hear a cacophany of sounds become music, for when disparate streams of tunes merge into a unified soul-stirring melody, I know there must have been a conductor of suitable genius.
For how can I ever doubt that He will unite people with such different talents into a loving and organic whole? Whether they be churches, couples or whoever, IN CHRIST, we find ourselves playing varying instruments, different notes at so many times, but orchestrated by the Conductor into pure, love soaked music that makes sense.
Thus if any should ask me? How can the church with so many personalities and talents unite, I'll say listen to Johann Pachelbel, Canon in D in particular, after which think along with me. If a man can display such genius, what more a supreme God whose genius makes Johann look like a dim firefly in the face of the sun, and whose every wave of the baton is an expression of all governing Love?
why? for in it, I hear a cacophany of sounds become music, for when disparate streams of tunes merge into a unified soul-stirring melody, I know there must have been a conductor of suitable genius.
For how can I ever doubt that He will unite people with such different talents into a loving and organic whole? Whether they be churches, couples or whoever, IN CHRIST, we find ourselves playing varying instruments, different notes at so many times, but orchestrated by the Conductor into pure, love soaked music that makes sense.
Thus if any should ask me? How can the church with so many personalities and talents unite, I'll say listen to Johann Pachelbel, Canon in D in particular, after which think along with me. If a man can display such genius, what more a supreme God whose genius makes Johann look like a dim firefly in the face of the sun, and whose every wave of the baton is an expression of all governing Love?
Friday, October 30, 2009
Death Bed Questions
Show me, O LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life.
Psalms 39:4
So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom.
Psalms 90:12
Of late, I've decided to ask myself death-bed questions. Those questions which will force me to re-evaluate my life in the light of my most probable death one day. I've been observing people around, and I notice that people make day to day choices which naturally diverge from the answers they would want to give to their death bed questions. What do I mean?
An example : I asked a man, what he wanted to be remembered as at his death bed. Without much of a thought, he said "a loving, godly man, especially to my family." I wasn't one for courtesy at that point and I said "With your working hours as they are now, you sure you can live up to that?" He gazes down and lifts his eyebrows, "I guess you're right."
I've asked myself that question too and I think some re-ordering is long in coming. Why are Death Bed questions useful? Well here are 2 reasons
1) Death Bed Questions allow us to focus on what is truly important in Christ. I asked my friends over at supper, the top three qualities of a wife that they were looking for. Amongst us we could come up with the usual - can cook and bake, can hold a solid conversation, cannot be fat .... etc. Then the question was modified slightly, it became, what will you want to say about your wife at your death bed. The answers were remarkably different. We wanted a supportive, understanding, godly and praying woman who would hold our hand and stay our final hours with us.
2) Death bed questions make light of the distractions that plague us everyday. The problem with most christians and people in general is that they make day to day choices that do not correspond to their death bed answers. By asking serious questions about our lives, we make light on things that actually matter little in our life which we could be taking too seriously. Money, Status ... etc, terrible distractions that hold our attention everyday that will hardly feature at our death bed.
It is my opinion that the biggest question that most people ask but do not live out is the question of "Am I truly saved?" And I implore all who read this, to spend time examining our lives.
Lastly, I know I'm not being particularly organised, but having asked myself these questions, I have set two resolutions
1) To redeem the times by disciplining myself alot more. That means ensuring that no minute is wasted indiscriminately.
2) To daily examine my life in the light of the cross. To ask the tough questions that are needed in the light of my death and my eventual meeting with Christ.
So teach us O Lord, to number our Days, that we may be wise.
Psalms 39:4
So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom.
Psalms 90:12
Of late, I've decided to ask myself death-bed questions. Those questions which will force me to re-evaluate my life in the light of my most probable death one day. I've been observing people around, and I notice that people make day to day choices which naturally diverge from the answers they would want to give to their death bed questions. What do I mean?
An example : I asked a man, what he wanted to be remembered as at his death bed. Without much of a thought, he said "a loving, godly man, especially to my family." I wasn't one for courtesy at that point and I said "With your working hours as they are now, you sure you can live up to that?" He gazes down and lifts his eyebrows, "I guess you're right."
I've asked myself that question too and I think some re-ordering is long in coming. Why are Death Bed questions useful? Well here are 2 reasons
1) Death Bed Questions allow us to focus on what is truly important in Christ. I asked my friends over at supper, the top three qualities of a wife that they were looking for. Amongst us we could come up with the usual - can cook and bake, can hold a solid conversation, cannot be fat .... etc. Then the question was modified slightly, it became, what will you want to say about your wife at your death bed. The answers were remarkably different. We wanted a supportive, understanding, godly and praying woman who would hold our hand and stay our final hours with us.
2) Death bed questions make light of the distractions that plague us everyday. The problem with most christians and people in general is that they make day to day choices that do not correspond to their death bed answers. By asking serious questions about our lives, we make light on things that actually matter little in our life which we could be taking too seriously. Money, Status ... etc, terrible distractions that hold our attention everyday that will hardly feature at our death bed.
It is my opinion that the biggest question that most people ask but do not live out is the question of "Am I truly saved?" And I implore all who read this, to spend time examining our lives.
Lastly, I know I'm not being particularly organised, but having asked myself these questions, I have set two resolutions
1) To redeem the times by disciplining myself alot more. That means ensuring that no minute is wasted indiscriminately.
2) To daily examine my life in the light of the cross. To ask the tough questions that are needed in the light of my death and my eventual meeting with Christ.
So teach us O Lord, to number our Days, that we may be wise.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Tell Satan to shut up
A little extract from John Bunyan's Autobiography, Grace Abounding
Now while the Scriptures lay before me, and laid sin anew at my door, that saying in Luke xviii.1, with others, did encourage me to prayer; then the tempter again laid at me very sore, suggesting, “That neither the mercy of God, nor yet the blood of Christ, did at all concern me, nor could they help me for my sin; therefore it was but in vain to pray.” Yet, thought I, “I will pray.” “But, said the tempter, your sin is unpardonable.” “Well, said I, I will pray.” “It is to no boot, said he.” “Yet, said I, I will pray.” So I went to prayer with God; and while I was at prayer, I uttered “Lord, Satan tells me, that neither thy mercy, nor Christ’s blood is sufficient to save my soul; Lord, shall I honour thee most, by believing thou wilt, and canst? or him, by believing that thou neither wilt, nor canst?” Lord, I would fain honour thee, by believing that thou wilt, and canst.
A few lessons
1) Prayer is dependence speaking to an independent all Consuming God whose grace is never insufficient
2) The Devil seeks to create doubt in the believer regarding God's abilities and character and tries to stop the believer from praying at all cost. Because when we pray, the Holy spirit exposes the lies - we should tell Satan to shut up.
3) when the devil is beaten through faith in our God, God gets the glory because it was He who gave the grace to pray and gives the grace unto salvation.
"No man," as Ravenhill so rightly points out, "is greater than his prayer life".
Now while the Scriptures lay before me, and laid sin anew at my door, that saying in Luke xviii.1, with others, did encourage me to prayer; then the tempter again laid at me very sore, suggesting, “That neither the mercy of God, nor yet the blood of Christ, did at all concern me, nor could they help me for my sin; therefore it was but in vain to pray.” Yet, thought I, “I will pray.” “But, said the tempter, your sin is unpardonable.” “Well, said I, I will pray.” “It is to no boot, said he.” “Yet, said I, I will pray.” So I went to prayer with God; and while I was at prayer, I uttered “Lord, Satan tells me, that neither thy mercy, nor Christ’s blood is sufficient to save my soul; Lord, shall I honour thee most, by believing thou wilt, and canst? or him, by believing that thou neither wilt, nor canst?” Lord, I would fain honour thee, by believing that thou wilt, and canst.
A few lessons
1) Prayer is dependence speaking to an independent all Consuming God whose grace is never insufficient
2) The Devil seeks to create doubt in the believer regarding God's abilities and character and tries to stop the believer from praying at all cost. Because when we pray, the Holy spirit exposes the lies - we should tell Satan to shut up.
3) when the devil is beaten through faith in our God, God gets the glory because it was He who gave the grace to pray and gives the grace unto salvation.
"No man," as Ravenhill so rightly points out, "is greater than his prayer life".
Sunday, October 25, 2009
3 things I want to be Healthily Uncaring about and 2 things I want to be obsessed with
Before an Almighty God who rules all and demands my life and all who read this post, I want to pray for a healthy, uncaring attitude towards these things
1) That the Lord will make me healthily uncaring towards money - salaries and its comparison with other peoples', bonuses and perks too. Towards the amount of money stored up in the bank account for on that glorious day, unused money will also have to be accounted for. To the type and size of housing that i will have and what other people have. Towards the accumulation of stuff like books, collectibles... etc.
2) That I will be healthily uncaring towards a person's status whether high or low - positions, appointments, positions of influence should be treated with a good dose of ambivalence. Education levels, Wealth and class type should be inconsequential in friendships. There is no point name dropping about who we know since its probably boasting and it demeans God when we find identity in associations with influential people rather than Jesus Christ.
3) That He will bless me with a healthy uncaring attitute towards outwards beauty - doesn't matter whether a person is fat, thin, ugly, beautiful or whatever, it should not entail a difference in treatment. No one should be valued on how he or she looks.
And there are 2 things I want to be healthily obsessed with
1) That God will grant me an obsession with Jesus - to be concerned about His Kingdom's matters - how money is used, how decisions are made, how people are treated, how theology is read and studied. To be pursuing Him with my whole life, driven by a compulsive love for Him and a total devotion in every thought, word and action on my part. To wish to pray, read the Word and sing because I do all these with Him and for Him. To realise that all these are impossible until He gave His life first and gave grace for us to love Him passionately.
2) That God will give me a healthy obsession with people's souls - to put all men in the perspective of a God who loves them and yet is just beyond compare. To be driven by a love for heaven and a fear of hell for their sake. To value every man equally in Christ and to do things that souls might be saved. To be people centric not activity centric and to realise that the reason I'm here is for the sake of souls under the ultimate purpose of loving Jesus Christ. To be loving towards the church and to desire it to grow in prayer and action.
May Jesus grant me all these for His glory. I, Charles Ng, hereby submit to all these. If this is for you too, let us pray this humbly and joyously in view of an eternity with a Loving and Great Christ.
1) That the Lord will make me healthily uncaring towards money - salaries and its comparison with other peoples', bonuses and perks too. Towards the amount of money stored up in the bank account for on that glorious day, unused money will also have to be accounted for. To the type and size of housing that i will have and what other people have. Towards the accumulation of stuff like books, collectibles... etc.
2) That I will be healthily uncaring towards a person's status whether high or low - positions, appointments, positions of influence should be treated with a good dose of ambivalence. Education levels, Wealth and class type should be inconsequential in friendships. There is no point name dropping about who we know since its probably boasting and it demeans God when we find identity in associations with influential people rather than Jesus Christ.
3) That He will bless me with a healthy uncaring attitute towards outwards beauty - doesn't matter whether a person is fat, thin, ugly, beautiful or whatever, it should not entail a difference in treatment. No one should be valued on how he or she looks.
And there are 2 things I want to be healthily obsessed with
1) That God will grant me an obsession with Jesus - to be concerned about His Kingdom's matters - how money is used, how decisions are made, how people are treated, how theology is read and studied. To be pursuing Him with my whole life, driven by a compulsive love for Him and a total devotion in every thought, word and action on my part. To wish to pray, read the Word and sing because I do all these with Him and for Him. To realise that all these are impossible until He gave His life first and gave grace for us to love Him passionately.
2) That God will give me a healthy obsession with people's souls - to put all men in the perspective of a God who loves them and yet is just beyond compare. To be driven by a love for heaven and a fear of hell for their sake. To value every man equally in Christ and to do things that souls might be saved. To be people centric not activity centric and to realise that the reason I'm here is for the sake of souls under the ultimate purpose of loving Jesus Christ. To be loving towards the church and to desire it to grow in prayer and action.
May Jesus grant me all these for His glory. I, Charles Ng, hereby submit to all these. If this is for you too, let us pray this humbly and joyously in view of an eternity with a Loving and Great Christ.
Monday, October 19, 2009
The wedding finished and I lumbered on my easy chair for a good rest. Being Best man is no easy work and by the looks of it, there are bound to be many more weddings to attend. I sigh, its beginning to have its effect. For two very special people that evening, it will always be that once-in-a-lifetime event. For a few hundred others, its another happy day watching the kingdom of Singledom shrink. I'm just not too sure I'm very pleased having the land around me collapse into the vast ocean.
I lift my glass and stare into the contents therein. Life is never the same for those who get married and for those who remain unmarried. Time moves people on and on, changing something, moving everything, even memories do not remain as they are. I've come to a conclusion. I need time with nature, somewhere in the mountains, lakesides, meadows, wherever that is. I chanced upon some pictures of Britain and nostalgia arose.
Lovely aren't they? what draws me to nature is the quiet, the humbling, the time with God and the silent rumination that follows. Walking alone was a great past-time in Brtain, and best amidst nature. I feel led to return again and i think I know why. My soul like many others, were made for marriage with Christ.
I lift my glass and stare into the contents therein. Life is never the same for those who get married and for those who remain unmarried. Time moves people on and on, changing something, moving everything, even memories do not remain as they are. I've come to a conclusion. I need time with nature, somewhere in the mountains, lakesides, meadows, wherever that is. I chanced upon some pictures of Britain and nostalgia arose.
Lovely aren't they? what draws me to nature is the quiet, the humbling, the time with God and the silent rumination that follows. Walking alone was a great past-time in Brtain, and best amidst nature. I feel led to return again and i think I know why. My soul like many others, were made for marriage with Christ.
Friday, October 16, 2009
To worship with Word and Music
When I see many of my BB Boys, one of the many concerns that lay upon my heart is whether they can develop in Christ in a holistic manner. Because of my temperament and those whom I serve with, we have focused heavily on the bible. And though I think that is right, by nature of our inadeqaucies, I also acknowledge that we have never been able to spur their spiritual growth on through music and unfettered worship.
The last thing I want my younger ones to learn is self consciousness in worship. No! Let them be like David, who upon the entry of the ark into Jerusalem, danced with great strength and remained healthily uncaring towards the common gaze or amusement of those around. Let not any think that raising one's hands in worship is a sin or inappropriate, except that one's heart should be truly contrite and readied for Him. Worship on the part of man, is the expression of a humble, joyous love towards a Worthy God.
And I accept that it is a tremendous inadequacy on my part. I cannot lead them to worship of this magnitute and Often I fear that their growth will be lopsided. That they should be Biblical, gospel centric and hating of dangerous heresies but ultimately unable to translate all these into a true, deep, longlasting love for Christ. But Charles you must see how the Lord is the only way. Lord teach us how to sing your praise with unfettered hearts! Teach us your songs! What I cannot do, O Lord, do still demonstrate the sufficiency of your grace...
When I was 15, in a park in Sembawang, I was aware of this in my life - the inability to teach men through worship with song. And very naturally, I told the Lord my conditions - my wife must be able to sing songs with anointing. It was all the hope I thought I had. Honestly, It was the expression of my weakness that I desired to rectify this so much. Now of course, I think its abit silly, but that's how i feel about this issue.
Teach me a new song, teach me to trust that you will grow your children according to your manifold love and power.
I end this with a song that Colin sent me. Excellent.
Do listen until the very end(the last part is funny).
Lyrics
Unashamed - Starfield
I have not much
To offer You
Not near what You deserve
But still I come
Because Your cross
Has placed in me my worth
Oh, Christ my King
Of sympathy
Whose wounds secure my peace
Your grace extends
To call me friend
Your mercy sets me free
And I know I'm weak
I know I'm unworthy
To call upon Your name
But because of grace
Because of Your mercy
I stand here unashamed
I can't explain
This kind of love
I'm humbled and amazed
That You'd come down
From heavens heights
And greet me face to face
The last thing I want my younger ones to learn is self consciousness in worship. No! Let them be like David, who upon the entry of the ark into Jerusalem, danced with great strength and remained healthily uncaring towards the common gaze or amusement of those around. Let not any think that raising one's hands in worship is a sin or inappropriate, except that one's heart should be truly contrite and readied for Him. Worship on the part of man, is the expression of a humble, joyous love towards a Worthy God.
And I accept that it is a tremendous inadequacy on my part. I cannot lead them to worship of this magnitute and Often I fear that their growth will be lopsided. That they should be Biblical, gospel centric and hating of dangerous heresies but ultimately unable to translate all these into a true, deep, longlasting love for Christ. But Charles you must see how the Lord is the only way. Lord teach us how to sing your praise with unfettered hearts! Teach us your songs! What I cannot do, O Lord, do still demonstrate the sufficiency of your grace...
When I was 15, in a park in Sembawang, I was aware of this in my life - the inability to teach men through worship with song. And very naturally, I told the Lord my conditions - my wife must be able to sing songs with anointing. It was all the hope I thought I had. Honestly, It was the expression of my weakness that I desired to rectify this so much. Now of course, I think its abit silly, but that's how i feel about this issue.
Teach me a new song, teach me to trust that you will grow your children according to your manifold love and power.
I end this with a song that Colin sent me. Excellent.
Do listen until the very end(the last part is funny).
Lyrics
Unashamed - Starfield
I have not much
To offer You
Not near what You deserve
But still I come
Because Your cross
Has placed in me my worth
Oh, Christ my King
Of sympathy
Whose wounds secure my peace
Your grace extends
To call me friend
Your mercy sets me free
And I know I'm weak
I know I'm unworthy
To call upon Your name
But because of grace
Because of Your mercy
I stand here unashamed
I can't explain
This kind of love
I'm humbled and amazed
That You'd come down
From heavens heights
And greet me face to face
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